We met with a woman who’d just been through one of the hardest seasons of her life.
Her father had passed away. His estate plan was clear. The trust was funded. Everything should have gone smoothly.

But it didn’t — because her brother had been named trustee.

He wasn’t a bad person.
But he wasn’t the right fit for the job.

He didn’t respond to emails.
He avoided tough conversations.
He didn’t keep good records.
And when questions came up — about money, distributions, timing — there were no answers.

The rest of the family felt shut out.
Unseen. Unheard.
And eventually, they started to suspect the worst.

Suspicion turned to tension.
Tension turned into accusations.
Eventually, a judge had to step in.

It wasn’t what their father wanted.
But it was the result of a decision that felt “simple” at the time — choosing the oldest son to keep the peace.

The plan that was supposed to bring peace — ended up fueling conflict.

And here’s the lesson:

Being a trustee isn’t about being the oldest.
Or the closest.
Or the most loved.

It’s about being:

• Organized

• Communicative

• Transparent

• Emotionally grounded

It’s a job — not an honor.

And if the person named can’t carry the weight of it…
The whole plan can fall apart.

A good estate plan isn’t just legal.
It’s personal.
And it only works if the people in charge are the right fit — not just on paper, but in real life.

Don’t let a poor fit turn your thoughtful planning into a family feud.
Choose wisely.
And revisit your decision as life changes.