A True Story About How “Equal” Doesn’t Always Mean Fair
A few years ago, we worked with three siblings who had just lost their mother.
She was the kind of woman who wanted to keep the peace, even after she was gone.
So she did what so many people do — she left everything split equally among her children.
On the surface, it sounded fair.
But in real life? It was anything but.
The Problem With “Equal”
The three siblings weren’t in the same place in life:
-
One daughter had lived with their mother for years, providing daily care.
-
Another child had already received large financial help during Mom’s lifetime — a house down payment and tuition for the kids.
-
The third lived out of state and had barely been involved in caregiving or family decisions.
When they read the will, the “equal” split didn’t feel equal to anyone.
The caregiver daughter felt unappreciated.
The others thought she was being “paid” for something she had done out of love.
Resentment boiled to the surface.
How It Fell Apart
What started as quiet frustration turned into arguments.
Arguments turned into legal action.
The family ended up in court — spending time, money, and emotional energy they didn’t have to spare.
The saddest part?
Their mother had meant well.
She truly thought she was preventing conflict by making things “even.”
But because the reasoning wasn’t clear and the planning wasn’t tailored, it did the opposite of what she wanted.
The Real Lesson
Estate planning isn’t about being “perfectly equal.”
It’s about being thoughtful, intentional, and honest about your decisions.
Fairness isn’t about numbers — it’s about preserving the family relationships that matter most.
A good plan does more than divide assets.
It provides clarity, reduces tension, and helps your loved ones stay united when it matters most.
Want to learn how to plan for fairness — and peace of mind?
Our free Florida Estate Planning Guide explains how to structure a plan that protects your family, avoids unnecessary probate, and prevents misunderstandings before they start.